Life is Too Short

As this is really my way of journaling now, I am going to post this for only that reason.  I try not to write too many "personal" things for the whole world to read, but this one is something that I want to include in my book at the end of the year....and if I don't write it now, I will forget to put it in.  So you may read this if you want, but it is really just for me.

Tomorrow my son goes away to Aaron's Camp for the week and as usual I will miss him madly!  It doesn't matter how many times he (or any of my other kids) goes away from me for longer than a day. . .the house always seems so empty.  And this week, with M going to Girl's Camp as well, it will seem twice as quiet.  I have grown attached to my children and I'm not ready to let them go yet.  Thank goodness they are not leaving the nest just yet, but it is getting closer and closer every day and it causes me great sadness at times.  And with them leaving for a week, this is one of those times.  Will I be able to let them go when the time comes???  I am sure I will, even though it will not be easy.  I have mentioned it many times that I dread the time that T will leave on his mission, so when he leaves for just a week and I struggle with that, how will I bear it when he is gone for 2 years.  After this summer, I will have one left with him as then the summer after that we will be getting him ready to go.  I'm not ready!  Can I just stop time right now and keep things as they are?!

I also have another reason for feeling this way about my son today and missing him already.  This weekend I almost lost him.  (Don't worry Mom, your grandson is fine)  That thought makes my heart stop every time I think about it and I am so grateful he is still with us.  He went rock climbing with his Priest Quorum like he has done many times before.  But this time it was different. . . he was the last one to rappell down and was on the rope when a large boulder decided to break off and come tumbling right at him.  It happened in a split second and it is only because he was unintentionally pulled to the side at the last minute as the rock brushed his arm on it's way down, smashing into several pieces at the bottom.  Those at the bottom easliy were able to get out of the one except one leader.  He dove to get under the overhang and as he did that, his arm caught the rope and he pulled it as he landed.  In doing so, it swung T out of the way just as the rock passed by and saved him. (Thank you Bro. S.)  T said that when he heard "ROCK" yelled, he looked up to see the sun for a second and then it all went dark as the rock blocked out the sun.  He said at that moment, he knew it was over. But he is hear to tell the tale without a scratch on him.  A miracle happened that day and it was because of the Lord's hand that my son is safe.

I am very grateful at the time this was happening my hubby and I were at the temple doing a session.  In my heart, I feel that the Lord was protecting him because we were where we should have been that morning.  I am sure that was only a small part of the bigger picture, which is that T still has much to accomplish here on earth and it just was not his time.  But I know that the Lord is aware of us all and of the things that we should be doing.  We could have put off going as we had things we could have done around the house, but we made the effort to go and I feel that we were blessed for doing so.

So I guess that might be a reason that this week especially I want to keep my son home with me, but I know that this is where he needs to be and he will be okay away from me.  Just as I will know that he will be okay when he leaves for his mission soon....he will be doing the Lord's work and that is where he should be.  But it will still not make it easier for me.  So when I say goodbye to him tomorrow, I will hold on a bit tighter and a bit longer than I normally would. . . and I will feel whole again when he returns and all will be right in our home again.